18 May 2012

What if the Wife Does Not Recognize the Husband's Authority

If you are a husband who has tried to exercise his authority in the home, the chances are that your authority has already been challenged. The challenge may not take the form of blatant defiance. Your wife may simply not recognize your authority. If she doesn't recognize you, the husband, as the leader of your marriage, then you cannot defend your authority before you have established it.

Go back to the basics and communicate with your wife. Follow the simple steps to take charge of your marriage. Make time to talk about it until you both agree that a traditional marriage, where the husband leads and the wife submits to him, is what is best for your marriage and your future together. Don't rush this process of agreement. You want a marriage that will last a lifetime so make the effort to invest the hours, days, weeks, or even months to talk through the details with your wife. You cannot have a successful, traditional marriage all by yourself - this is going to take both you and your wife committing to the ideals and the constraints of the marriage. Talk, talk, and talk some more until you both are ready to commit to being a traditionally married couple.

Exercising your authority as husband will be a lot easier if your wife accepts that you have authority over her. Exercising your authority may never be easy for you, but having a wife who wants to submit to you will help you grow in your authority. Rush to take charge without giving your wife the chance to CHOOSE to submit to you, and you will quickly become a sadistic tyrant in her eyes.


  1. If my husband wanted to have authority over me we would be in divorce court really fast. He as a man does not have that right.

    1. Thanks for your comment, Nicole. A marriage where the husband leads and the wife follows works best if this decision (to have such a traditional marriage) is reached as a couple. Once the couple decides to have this kind of marriage, the marriage roles become distinct. The husband's gift to his wife is then to lead, while her gift to him is to submit to that leadership. Loving is mostly about giving, and the richest marriages are those where each spouse gives more than they take. It shouldn't be about your husband wanting to rule over you - it should be about you wanting to give him the best marriage he can have. If you already have the perfect marriage, then congratulations. If there is room for improvement, then why not explore new ideas for improvement together - spend time learning as a couple and you will grow as a couple.